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Date:      Sat, 16 Mar 2002 05:20:37 -0500
From:      "Chauncey Smith" <csmith@icdc.com>
To:        <newbies@FreeBSD.ORG>
Subject:   Newbie experience
Message-ID:  <000401c1ccfa$241f35c0$2c14fea9@ultra2000>

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I have to tell you guys. I'm wrote this because I was talking to a buddy
about FreeBSD and the stuff I've done since Christmas and he laughed and
thought the world should know so he helped me write the following. Please
feel free to laugh and comment. We're still laughing.


My newbie experience with FreeBSD has being one of the most intense and fun
times since college when I learned about women. Yes FreeBSD has a lot in
common with women and some differences. One the manual is passed down inside
of the code itself is very similar to women. Two if you do something wrong
you man not always understand the error code. Three you have to keep trying
to get it right. Lastly trashing it all and starting again new isn't all
ways the best coarse of action.

Women know what they want. They know what they want you to do and how they
dream of you doing it. They have a blueprint of the relationship and your
responses all mapped out ahead of time. For lack of a better term this is
like a computer manual of input that equals some output. It is the same with
FreeBSD. The manual for FreeBSD is nicely loaded on the computer with the
software. This is a great advantage to have a manual handy to read when you
need it most. With the Man Pages, the traditional Unix help text, and the
FreeBSD handbook there should almost be no question you can't answer. The
downfall of both these systems is you have to be able to get to the data.
Also you must have it available when you want to use it.
Let's look at setting up xwindows.  Unless you have Xwindows up and running
you can't read the handbook or a man page and type in the commands. I use to
have a girl friend that would always say to me "You know what you're doing".
The secret was I never knew what the hell I was doing. I felt this way with
FreeBSD and went out and got a book of man pages and the handbook.

Let's stick with the same girl friend as above. She'd say that and then
start the silent treatment or have a little tantrum. (She was so sexy when
she was angry, which is one reason I loved her so much.) This is like a
computer error code. You get it you don't know what it's for but all you
know is you're computer isn't working right. I was compiling a kernel for
the first time and received Error Code 1. No line number or anything to tell
me where the error was or what it was. I typed Man errorcode 1. My computer
didn't reply. Just like Linda when I'd be like what's wrong sweetie.
Actually Linda would have something smart to say like" don't sweetie me you
asshole. You know what you did". Remember what I said before. I had no clue.
But locked away she knew. And thought I was as smart as she was and knew
too. Having some experience with Linda helped me here. I started with the
Generic kernel and copied it. Changed just the ident and the CPU
information. Then I compiled it. Bang it worked. So I took out section by
section things I didn't need making a fresh copy each time until it stopped
working and figured that's the line I really need in there somewhere. I don'
t know what it is but hell I need it so I'm keeping it. My system runs
great. After 10 recompiles of the kernel.

In college and my mid-twenties it feels like I changed girl friends with the
weather. There is a list of women that I've thought was the cat's meow. I'm
not the world's greatest lover nor do I look like Fabio or anything. I'm
just and normal Joe in a city that lived a good single life. (Hell I'm still
living it.) I've learned now that I'm in my 30's that if you want that one
really great relationship you're going to have to work on it. You're
thinking how is getting dumped or dumping your girlfriends going to relate
to computers? I had a bear of a time loading Xwindows for the first time.
Xf86config was not my friend. We had a couple of knock down drag 'em outs
and hell I'm playing video games on the playstation or dreamcaster. We even
had one night when I decided that cable was better then that. After I got it
set up then the program refused to run with startx or initx from any other
user but root. My solution from my experience with Windows  was for me to
dump the OS and reload the OS on to the hard drive. Well after the 5 time I
decided to read a book. Some how with the same CD and everything it worked
great on my laptop but not my desktop. There is a little question about some
kind a link in there. If you say no you'll never run xfree86 again. I lost a
lot of time with the reformatting and starting over.

Computers and women will teach you a lot about patience and perseverance.
You have to stick with the really good ones to get what you want out of
them. Listen even when you don't want to. Give them time to work out what's
in there head to make them happy. I'm greatful to have had the chance to
learn so much so fast because with women it takes a long time but with
computers it's just a few short months.





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