From owner-freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG  Sun Aug 21 15:30:12 2011
Return-Path: <owner-freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG>
Delivered-To: freebsd-doc@hub.freebsd.org
Received: from mx1.freebsd.org (mx1.freebsd.org [IPv6:2001:4f8:fff6::34])
	by hub.freebsd.org (Postfix) with ESMTP id 331ED106564A
	for <freebsd-doc@hub.freebsd.org>; Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:12 +0000 (UTC)
	(envelope-from gnats@FreeBSD.org)
Received: from freefall.freebsd.org (freefall.freebsd.org
	[IPv6:2001:4f8:fff6::28])
	by mx1.freebsd.org (Postfix) with ESMTP id 215408FC18
	for <freebsd-doc@hub.freebsd.org>; Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:12 +0000 (UTC)
Received: from freefall.freebsd.org (localhost [127.0.0.1])
	by freefall.freebsd.org (8.14.4/8.14.4) with ESMTP id p7LFUBWP072330
	for <freebsd-doc@freefall.freebsd.org>; Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:11 GMT
	(envelope-from gnats@freefall.freebsd.org)
Received: (from gnats@localhost)
	by freefall.freebsd.org (8.14.4/8.14.4/Submit) id p7LFUBY8072325;
	Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:11 GMT (envelope-from gnats)
Date: Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:11 GMT
Message-Id: <201108211530.p7LFUBY8072325@freefall.freebsd.org>
To: freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.org
From: Warren Block <wblock@wonkity.com>
Cc: 
Subject: Re: docs/159897: [patch] improve HAST section of Handbook
X-BeenThere: freebsd-doc@freebsd.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.5
Precedence: list
Reply-To: Warren Block <wblock@wonkity.com>
List-Id: Documentation project <freebsd-doc.freebsd.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <http://lists.freebsd.org/mailman/listinfo/freebsd-doc>,
	<mailto:freebsd-doc-request@freebsd.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <http://lists.freebsd.org/pipermail/freebsd-doc>
List-Post: <mailto:freebsd-doc@freebsd.org>
List-Help: <mailto:freebsd-doc-request@freebsd.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <http://lists.freebsd.org/mailman/listinfo/freebsd-doc>,
	<mailto:freebsd-doc-request@freebsd.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Sun, 21 Aug 2011 15:30:12 -0000

The following reply was made to PR docs/159897; it has been noted by GNATS.

From: Warren Block <wblock@wonkity.com>
To: Benjamin Kaduk <kaduk@mit.edu>
Cc: freebsd-gnats-submit@freebsd.org, freebsd-doc@freebsd.org
Subject: Re: docs/159897: [patch] improve HAST section of Handbook
Date: Sun, 21 Aug 2011 08:43:53 -0600 (MDT)

 On Sat, 20 Aug 2011, Benjamin Kaduk wrote:
 
 > On Thu, 18 Aug 2011, Warren Block wrote:
 >
 >> -	  <para>File system agnostic, thus allowing to use any file
 >> +	  <para>File system agnostic, thus allowing use of any file
 >
 > I think "allowing the use" is better here.
 
 "allowing any" might be even better.
 
 >>       <para>Once the <acronym>HAST</acronym> framework is configured
 >> 	properly, the final step is to make sure that
 >> -	<acronym>HAST</acronym> is started during the system boot time
 >> -	automatically.  The following line should be added to the
 >> -	<filename>/etc/rc.conf</filename> file:</para>
 >> +	<acronym>HAST</acronym> is started automatically during the system
 >> +	boot.  This line is added to
 >> +	<filename>/etc/rc.conf</filename>:</para>
 >
 > "This line is added" is a pretty unusual grammatical construct for what is 
 > attempting to be conveyed.  "To do so, add this line to" I think says things 
 > more clearly.
 
 I would prefer the imperative "Add this line to...".
 
 >> -	<para>In order to fix this situation the administrator has to
 >> +	<para>The administrator must
 >> 	  decide which node has more important changes (or merge them
 >> -	  manually) and let the <acronym>HAST</acronym> perform
 >> +	  manually) and let <acronym>HAST</acronym> perform
 >> 	  the full synchronization of the node which has the broken
 >
 > Just "full synchronization", I think.
 
 Changing "of" to "on" ("full synchronization on the node") also helps a 
 bit.