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Date:      Wed, 03 Dec 2008 20:43:26 +0100
From:      Gabor PALI <pgj@FreeBSD.org>
To:        Manolis Kiagias <sonic2000gr@gmail.com>
Cc:        Tom Rhodes <trhodes@FreeBSD.org>, freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.org
Subject:   Re: RFR: A "Boot Time Splash Screens" Section to the Handbook
Message-ID:  <4936E15E.8000804@FreeBSD.org>
In-Reply-To: <49359EA1.3080600@gmail.com>
References:  <493155ED.8020004@FreeBSD.org>	<49316309.1050407@gmail.com>	<49330A66.8040801@FreeBSD.org> <20081201091730.0ef555fa.trhodes@FreeBSD.org> <49359784.504@FreeBSD.org> <49359EA1.3080600@gmail.com>

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Manolis Kiagias wrote:
> I like the improvements too :)
> If I were to make a few changes (at the edge of these being doc-bikesheds):

Absolutely not, it IS suggested by the FDP Primer [1]:

``Avoid redundant phrases

Try not to use redundant phrases. In particular, "the command", "the
file", and "man command" are probably redundant.''


Hopefully, I will reach this section of the FDP Primer in the Hungarian
translation soon :)  Thanks for the comment!


I fixed the parts in question, so you can proof-check the results here:

(in HTML:)
http://people.freebsd.org/~pgj/patches/2008/12/03/html/boot-blocks.html#BOOT-SPLASH

(in unified diff format:)
http://people.freebsd.org/~pgj/patches/2008/12/03/splash.screen.section.patch.diff


Regards,
:g

[1] http://www.freebsd.org/doc/en/books/fdp-primer/writing-style.html



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